*The palpable Cockblock travels out to see the exotic sights of the world.*

Why hello there! It’s me the Cockblock. I just got back from Paris and I got to see the mighty Eiffel Tower.

For those who don’t know the Eiffel tower, or “La Tour Eiffel” as they say in France, is a gigatnic architectural abomination with a corrupt and somewhat pointless purpose. Just like me! It was made in the late 80’s when people’s perception on beauty was undeveloped, and as such only about half of the world’s population think it’s pretty. It is one of the tallest structures in the world and it uses this height to its advantage when it plays basketball with the other buildings at night. There is a radio antennae or something at the top too.

Aside from the antennae, the tower’s main use is to generate tourist income. There is a line for the elevator to go up and see the tower. The line is ridiculously long and I’m a busy Cockblock so I decided to take the stairs which has no line at all for some strange reason…

I think I may have been a little over my head here…Especially since I just remembered I have no legs.

Several hours later I reached the first floor, The inside of the tower is all metal and industrial and there are cute little fences to keep me from falling off.

My efforts to mingle with my fellow tourists are met with sparse response.

No worries, as the journey has just begun. The second flight of stairs will take me to the second floor.

After climbing up more horrible stairs I reach the gift shop. Here I find a nursery holding the tower’s babies and I spend some time enjoying something more my size.

Lucky for me there are no more stairs to get to the top. The only way to advance to the next floor is to take an elevator.

The inside of the top of the tower looks like a big metal space submarine, but once you climb just a few more terrible terrible stairs you get to reach the viewing area.

I am amazed by the specatuclar view and after trying figuring out how to use a telescope I spend some time enjoying the beauty of this triangular city

On my way out some friendly tourists stopped by to give me a hug and recieve a magic cockblock blessing. I forgot which blessing I gave them so by now they are either happily enjoying each other’s company or one of them has murdered the other.

It has been an exciting time and now its time to climb all the way back down.

When I reached the ground again nightfall had come and the tower lights up in a full on pea-cocking display of gaudiness and sparkles.

What a magical thing! It was fun sharing my trip with you. I hope you will come hear future tales of my other travels soon.