Hello friends today I am going to spend a day at the San Francisco Zoo. An exotic cornucopia of animals. Zoos are wonderful little places to learn and see creatures of the world.
However today I will be visiting the San Francisco Zoo. San Francisco has currently evolved into some sort of technology-smothered future city. Using the city’s magical powers such as “high rent” and “elitism” the growing bastion has successfully managed outcast and destroy all lifeforms that are incapable of working in startups. This includes animals.
The result leaves the zoo and all other non-trendy parks nothing more then a bleak desolate wasteland where the attractions sit and wait for a sliver of attention from the last remaining visitors that still think the animal kingdom is more interesting then their iPads.
But dont worry, Cockblock is here to enjoy the last few bits of this dying park! Let go look at some animals.
The flamingo is a magical bird that uses shrimp cocktails to throw lavishly flamboyant parties in the Castro. Many flamingos like to gather in these parties and mingle while listening to dubstep/witchhouse remixes.
Here is the mystical and wise toucan, creator of the cereal that tastes like artificial flavoring.
The next animal is mystical creature the Unicorn. This particular one was sort of fat and old looking though. Maybe the zoo needs to feed it more rainbows or little girl’s wishes or something.
Other animals I took a peak at where the koala bear. Nature’s deadbeat roommate of the forest.
The ferocious lions! Not wanting to be a fine chicken nugget snack for them I settled with bonding with the zoo’s much more pacifistic bronze lions.
And then we have the penguin. The bird that reversed the world and thinks the ocean is the sky. Truly a sad tale but you must always admire their ambition.
While heading my way to the less exotic animals. I stopped to look at this evil dirt hamster. It was not pleased to see me.
Hello mr’ Turkey. I see you are also a fan of pointless red floppy head accessories. We have much in common.
…I dont think he took that remark well… Fine! I will go find some animals that actually enjoy my presence.
Ah the barn animals. A chicken goes in the barn! Maybe these animals will appreciate my corners.
Duck! Hey Duck! What you doing Duck!
The Goats have accepted me! Good times with goat time.
Well now that I have finally found some animals that have taken me in I can go home one satisifed zoo visitor.
Thanks for letting me share my day with you See you next time!
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